The Beast Within

In the darkness of the soul
in the deepest corners
lies a creature waiting to escape.

The furry that frightens us all
Living deep within
laying doormat, patiently
awaiting the moment to be set free.


The sins of the past and future
lie deep in its hands
as it struggles to destroy you.
Chipping away the walls
that were built to protect you.

Brick by brick
they come crumbling down,
leaving you bare
with nothing to hide
and no where to go,
all alone
on the road to destruction.


Never knowing
when the pain will end
nor which way to turn
or what tomorrow will bring.
Only seeing
the darkness of the past.


The redness of it all that
runs before your eyes
as it seems to become
so distant,
so faint.


The pain dripping
drop by drop
into the cup of life
as it over flows
with red sorrows
that keep you alive.
Never understanding

the tears that will be shed.
Never seeing the broken hearts
of those who know you so well
and love you threw the deepest sins
Never looking to see that someone cares
and those you are leaving behind.


You thought you had nothing
we are all better off without you here.
You thought that you were all alone
With all your fears.


We all stand in front of you today
wondering where we failed
and what we did wrong,
it wasn't in any song.
Only wishing we had the chance
to say good bye.


Its to late now to hold your hand
or for you to make us understand.
We only have the memories
of you in our dreams,
the sadness in our hearts,
and the guilt in our minds.
What should we of done for you.


All that's left is the memory
Of the smile in your eyes,
the warmth in your heart,
and the joy they gave me.
Only one regret.
I will never be able to tell you
How much I care
I waited until it was to late..


(c) Michelle Schweiss 99



This poem is sorta writen strange form two side of things....most know i am bi-polar and part of that is the lows that i face and i can and do get suicidal so it speaks from that side of me ... then i have had someone close to me kill theirself so it also speaks from that side.  This was one of my daughters favorite poems